Rise

I get into my head a lot, over the tiniest details. I can ponder for ages over whether coffee tastes better when I drink it with the lid on the takeout cup or without; I can contemplate outfits days ahead of going out and I probably spend immeasurable hours thinking about how I feel.

How do I feel about this? This person? This object? This situation?

The unfortunate coupling of self-awareness and introspection often leads me to judge myself for my emotions; and for the conscious effort I make to keep them in check. It’s tedious to not accept yourself for who you really are. Why do I do this? 

Note the use of the word ‘I’: once upon a time, when I did a creative writing piece in high school, I used to generalize my personal opinions behind the veil of ‘we’. It would be ironic to try to hide myself, now.

Would the world, I wonder, be a brighter place if we all wore our hearts on our sleeves? Would my, tiny, world be a little bit nicer if I chose to let myself live without fear? I know other people are scared, just like me. Scared to let themselves love in the way they want to. Scared to reach out a little bit more. Scared to let themselves free fall through the infinite skies – to feel their hair burn around their face and the pressure crash through their bodies as the world plummets.

So, so scared.

If you’ve been looking for a sign to let yourself feel what you’ve been trying to hide: this is it. Take my hand, and let us, together, experience ourselves through the depth of emotion birthed by our own souls. For all emotion is fuelled by love – love gained, lost, craving, absent; and love is above all things. Maybe falling isn’t what we should be doing – we should, rather… rise.

I'm, undoubtedly, selfish in this invitation to you to let yourself live with your emotions - because, truth be told, I want company. I would love to see people smile when they want to, bubble up inside when they see people who make them happy. It would warm me to see people laugh until their sides ache, and to tell all the people that they love how they truly feel. 

In a world where your emotions are put aside so you can fit the grey scale description of perfection - let us together have the courage to colour the sky with the palettes of our hearts.